I'm
ready to live fully. The reheated coffee (that I'd originally made so
carefully by roasting my own beans to the perfect darkness and then made
in a clay jabana the traditional way that the Ethiopian founders of
coffee make it) boiled over in the microwave. My throats burns and my
sinuses throb but I know there is more to this day. I eased my weary
aching body into the hot-tub. And my sanctuary didn't fail me. I breathed
in deeply, slowly and held my breath, my lungs open and full before
releasing it and all that I was carrying. The demands of life,
committees wanting members, the weariness from our
cleaning-purging-fixing-buying-selling that has happened, the seasonal
urge to can and forge for winter food for my family and the ever present
question of what's for supper slips away. There is just me, sitting in
the sunshine in my place, in peace. But yet there is more than just me- I
allow myself to go deeper, to the things that matter and that are to
many unknown and unseen. My thoughts turn to my Heavenly Father and the sunshine
turns into a warm embrace from Him. And I was swept away, to a place
where I am whole, I am healed and I dance in praise and worship. I am
left in awe of my God and His powerful love. Tears wash away the stress
and the mess I make on my own. And what I feel is more than having a
silent house. It's more than the freedom of not having preschoolers to
care for. It's more than anything this world offers. My heart is open
and my hands release what they tightly held. His glory settled on me,
making me come alive. The bigness of my life made minute compared to the
wonder of Him. I praise the One who loves me and created me. And I breath in, fully alive.
"I pray that he will use his glorious riches to make you strong. May his Holy Spirit give you his power deep down inside you. Then
Christ will live in your hearts because you believe in him. And I pray
that your love will have deep roots. I pray that it will have a strong
foundation. May
you have power together with all the Lord’s holy people to understand
Christ’s love. May you know how wide and long and high and deep it is. And may you know his love, even though it can’t be known completely. Then you will be filled with everything God has for you." ~Ephesians 3:16-19
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